Uncle?? wtf!

wtf

I’m only 34, but kids are already calling me ‘uncle’. I mean what the fuck!! Okay.. I understand a few strands of my hair have turned white silver and I’ve lost hair over the years but that still doesn’t make me an uncle. Uncles are old, they walk slow, they struggle to use their android phones and if you ask them one thing, they end up giving a lesson. How can they think I’m all that? I think I told the kid once to call me by my name Savio, but NO, its an Indian thing..for respect you need to call your elders uncle. 

Kids! you tell them not to do/say something, they’ll do just that! So like seriously, I mean what is the use telling the kid anything? He isn’t gonna listen to you anyways!

Okay, so now I’m officially (not officially official) ‘an uncle’ to my neighbors kids. My Mother (at the age she is) doesn’t like to be called an ‘aunty’ by random kids. I remember she once snapped at a harmless kid who called her aunty saying “I’m not your mother’s sister”. I don’t think the kid caught on to what she said but that outburst was enough for him to understand that it was not well received. 

So what are the rules to be called an Uncle? (Like there are rules! What do you mean? Everything in India has rules…READ ON)

Uncles have Grey/white/silver hair, little hair or no hair 

Uncles have pot Bellies

Uncles have beards, mustaches or both.

If you’re clean shaven..they’ll still call you Uncle 😉 Kids are stoooopid 😉

Uncles are always found with a kid

Anyone who is NOT studying and is working is an Uncle

Uncles wear glasses

Uncles eat samosa’s

Okay.. so I don’t have a pot belly, I don’t have a kid, I wear glasses (so what?) and for the record, I hate samosas (I like batata vadas tho’)! So why do kids call me Uncle? Has to be Respect, that’s it…YES. I suddenly feel so good about myself 🙂 

So now you’re called an uncle…what do you do?

You can chose to ignore!  

You can just smile it off! 

OR – You can simply play along! Ask them for a glass of water, get a chair, make kids do stuff for you and enjoy the moment!

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