Good manners?

They couldn’t get enough of each other, as their relationship grew from their initial making eye-contact-days to now wanting to do it. Their kisses grew in intensity, as it was now getting a regular affair that Kaira and Mihir would head back to his apartment after working hours.

They decided that today would be THE day to take that step ahead. Mihir knew the couch wasn’t the right place, as he carried Kaira into the bedroom after their rather extra prolonged exploring session on the couch. 

No sooner they got onto the bed, they lost the rest of their clothing. He asked her;

“Are you sure?” Mihir was a true gentleman

“Yes” she replied, as he reached out to the side drawer to pull out a condom packet. He excused himself to the bathroom to put it on. She seemed confused..

“You know I could have put it on for you..” 

He smiled and said “It’s just good manners”

 

 

Romance is dead

To quote google, Romance “is a feeling of excitement and mystery associated with love”

…but unfortunately over the years, the word Romance has taken a whole different meaning to young couples. People are more in the feeling-each-other mode nowadays. So, where is the mystery left in love? Nobody is interested in knowing about their significant other, it’s all about getting to know their answer to “are we sexually compatible”? Let’s take it from there…

Discovering each other before marriage is what ‘youngsters’ claim as romance. We all know how women get turned on by touch…and guys know just the right buttons, an art seemed to have been mastered over time. I don’t know where they learn it from but they seem to know all the right moves…and some girls actually enjoy it. One things leads to another and no sooner you’re baring everything to somebody you barely even know.

Is this Romance? Shedding clothes and getting physical with a total stranger?

I’ve been told by people, how would we know if we are compatible with each other if we didn’t do it before marriage? It’s as if SEX is the end-all to being in a relationship with another person.
What happened to the old-age technique of holding hands? Going for a walk in the park/at the beach and have actual conversations? I’m sure girls/women still dig candle-lit dinners, being gifted roses, a simple ‘good morning, I Love You’ text msg…no wait, its WhatsApp now!

I may be romantically challenged… (or at least I think I am, being single over a long period makes you think you are!) but romance to me is probably going out of my way to make an ordinary day extraordinary for ‘her’ simply because I want to.  I want to have the butterfly feeling when I am with her

Call me old school…but its the small things that make all the difference, the big, more exciting stuff can wait! Let’s leave something for later…considering we have a long way to go!

Now this is more like it <3  

“Massage Services”

456        123

Yes, you read that right “Massage Services”. These kinds of ads have been appearing on the goan newspapers of late under the ‘Situations Vacant’. If not Sofiya or Jyoti, its Rashmi or Monica, the name doesn’t matter, its the service and the rate that is supposed to catch the eye.

The curious fellow that I am, I called one number up…some guy speaking hindi picks the call, the phone call goes like this:

Me: Hello &%#$ female Massage Service?

He Man: aap interested ho? (are you interested)

Me: Yes but I have questions

He: kya poochna hai (what do you have to ask?)

Me: (I switch to hindi): karna kya hai? (what has to be done?)

He: ladies ko service karna hai (you need to service ladies)
~ like ladies need servicing! I understood what he was trying to say..but wanted to play around ~

Me: service matlab (what do you mean by service)

He: bas sex karna hai aur usko satisfy karna hai (you just need to have sex and satisfy her)

Me: Aur woh satisfy nahi hua toh? (and what if she is not satisfied?)

He: Aap really interested ho? (are you really interested?)
~ he was getting fedup with the questions, tho’ I had not finished

He: Aap interested ho toh, aaj hi Rs. 1850 account mein baro. Mein sms se account no bhejta hoon. (If you are interested you need to deposit Rs 1850 in the account of which I will send the no to you thru sms)

He: paise kab daloge? (when will you deposit the money?)

Me: Give me 2 days, what type of women need servicing?

He: basically humare paas NRI hai jo husband bahar kaam karte hai (we basically have NRI’s whose husbands are working abroad)

He: What is your name?

Me: Jojo

He: Account mein paise milne se, ek ghante ke baad aapko call aayega aur cab aapko pick karne ke liye aayega aur aapka meter chalu ho jayega (On receiving the money, 1 hour later you will get a call and a cab will pick you up and from then on your meter (money) is running.

Me: ok!
~phone call cut~

I wonder what kind of people actually believe they can earn 18,000/- a day! …and that too servicing females? 

…and if you thought men were adventurous, women are right up there as well!

 

 

 

Flavors of Life

Everything is flavored nowadays

..from Ice Cream to Milk to cigarettes, even Condoms! ..and I ask myself Condoms!? Like seriously!? Aren’t flavors used to make taste better? From where did the concept of flavoring condoms come from? 😐

I was at the super market yesterday, you know..looking around, buying the normal stuff. I came to the shaving section to purchase razor blades for myself, a shelf lower was the condom section..all the varieties possible. It wasn’t the condom boxes that caught my eye tho’, it was what was written on the box.

“Now in pineapple, coconut and Pina Colada flavour “

Fuck! Until now I only thought Pina Colada was a mocktail. I don’t even know what Pina Colada tastes like and here we have people doing other people with Pina Colada flavored condoms..how gross is that!!?? It doesn’t end there…there’s a preference of colored or dotted 😄😄😄

Okayyyy!! I have a question..

Why would condom makers flavour their condoms? Does it make the sex more aromatic? besides being pleasurable…! I don’t know!

What can we expect next?r

I don’t use condoms…wait!that didn’t sound right.

I haven’t used a condom till date...wait!I know what you’re thinking..it isn’t like that

Okay!..let me put it very blatantly  ‘I’ve not popped any cherries as yet’

A normal condom v/s a flavored one…I don’t quite see the difference. Maybe for those who’ve experienced the pleasure/aroma of love making may able to say more.

However to end, a question going out to females in general…

Which flavour do you prefer? I mean seriously..you are going to be left with some aroma (after the act) there’s no denying that. It isn’t rocket science to figure that out!

Think about that condom for once, its got the worst job ever! After everything… it’s thrown into one corner!